Is it so wrong that I love to take naps during the day on my memory foam mattress? Do I have a problem that I sneak off early to my bed — in search of alone time — to go to bed before the rest of my family? What about that I sleep with ear plugs and a pillow over my head? Does that say This girl has issues? She does not want to be a part of life?
My husband sleeps in another room. Not far away, less that 20 feet from my head to his but still it’s not the same bed. When we sleep together, he snores and I don’t like to be touched at night. I wake easily by his light snoring and I go into flight or fight reflex if he wraps his arm around me. I complain and he leaves the room so he can get a good nights sleep. It’s become easier for him to sleep in the guest room across the hall from our master bedroom. No one gets woken up with this situation. (Now might be the time to mention we’ve been together for 30 years, married 23).
My Husband came to my bed and woke me up this morning with a need for intimacy that I did not feel. I kept the ear plugs in and the pillow over my head. All I said was, “I wanted to sleep late today.” I feel so guilty that I don’t respond if I don’t feel like it and this morning I had no desire. As I lay in bed, pillow over my head, I thought I should be wearing pretty panties for husband. Not the big, white, Hane’s hi-cut briefs that are so comfortable. What happened to those days when I bought Maidenform matching sets for hubby? I used to go to great lengths to buy stockings, garters, bra and panties, back in the good old days. But, Hubby doesn’t complain. He sees beauty beneath all the outer stuff (like big white undies) and truly seems in love with me for who I am. He appreciates the essence of my femininity and gets off on something he sees in me that I often lack the ability to see in myself. I feel he needs pretty lace panties to find me attractive but he doesn’t. It’s been years since I bought that stuff. I shouldn’t even be thinking that’s what he needs. He would rather just have his wife take the ear plugs out of her ears and the pillow off her head and engage in mutually satisfying sex.
Sigh… I suspect the medication is causing a lack of desire. ♥ Daylily