Aside

A first in many…

A first in many months I made it through the entire week and weekend without a drop of alcohol.  I am pleased with myself!

I didn’t intend for my blog to morph into my so-called drinking problem but it appears that is exactly what’s going on.  My depression is under control, my PTSD issues from childhood sexual abuse have taken a backseat in my life so it stands to reason that the final chapter for treating my mental illness is to stop self-medicating with alcohol. 

To recap — I walked through my therapist’s door back in November seeking help with my depression and admitting to Lynn that I drank way too much wine.  My blood pressure was high at my last annual doctor’s visit in September and I think the excessive drinking was the main reason.  I didn’t want to get on high blood pressure meds so the doctor gave me some time to make life style changes.  The time had come for me to seek help and address my drinking problem.

So, all of this is going fast — at least now it seems so to me.  I had a goal and I’m on my way to achieving it.  All since September, that’s 7 months!  I didn’t believe I would get to this calm of a state of mind as quickly as I have.  It is absolutely the antidepressants I’m taking and I’m pleased my desire/need for alcohol has shrunk to a level I can manage. 

I have nothing more to say — I feel relaxed and calm.  Why ask why?  I’ll just enjoy it while it lasts.  ♥

5 responses to “A first in many…

  1. This is very good news

  2. Good for you man.
    You sound so strong and positive and CLEAN. Like a Beacon of Hope.
    lots of love and goodwill
    x

    (Funny how my blog’s also “morphed”… into one about MY disease; I think its called co-alcoholism? I’m surfing al-anon right now. I’m obsessed with my man’s drinking and its fucking up my life.)

    • You are so positive for me. Thanks!

      I know you are a strong woman and you like to be in control of your life. Your man’s drinking is so out of your control it’s got you thinking he’s fucking up your life. He’s not, really. He’s screwing himself because of his own inner demons. Try not to focus on what you can’t change. Look at all of the good things you do for his life, for the kids and for yourself. Don’t get bogged down with his problems. (Except the drinking and driving you’ve mentioned because that can effect others lives).

      A quote from AL-ANON (which I happen to have on a bookmark that showed up in a used book I bought!)

      “Just for today I will adjust myself to what is, and not try to adjust everything to my own desires. I will take my ‘luck’ as it comes, and fit myself to it.”

      It’s hard to let go but it will give you some peace of mind. I hope I didn’t come off as to preachy. –Daylily

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