November 9, 2011
Slept pretty well again. I did wake up at 4:30 am and after taking 3 Tums, I fell back to sleep until 7:00. Felt cloudy and tired after my part-time job which got me home at 1:00. I feel a bit like I woke up too early and I’ve been sleep walking all day. It’s difficult to find the words to finish a sentence or thought. I ate lunch and went to my bed. I climbed under the covers and put a pillow over my head to block out all light. Dropped off and woke up feeling like my arms were made of lead and I couldn’t lift them. Not sure where the intense heaviness is coming from. Drug withdrawal?
This afternoon I bought a smoothie at McDonald’s because I thought the sugary, sweet drink would be a good replacement for a glass of wine that I’ve been craving. It helped because this is my bewitching hour -5:00 – when I like to have a glass of wine while I make dinner. Tonight the boys don’t have any sports so it’s typically night to drink.
I want to see what I feel like without any mood altering medications or other substances in my system.